A Little July 4th Celebration & A Little Plagerism

Hot damn! It’s a 4 day weekend! Thank you America’s forefathers for providing me with a day off of work to do laundry, clean the kitchen, and disenfect the hall bathroom! 

I love a good 4th of July and  I love fireworks. Sparkly, thundering, screaching rockets of excitement. That’s what I call them. Yep, i actually say all of those adjectives and adverbs when referring to my beloved fireworks. I also, can’t help but ooooh and ahhh. One might say fireworks are cheesy. I say to heck with you naysaying party pooping un-american whiners.  

Yesterday I recieved a new laptop from work. And when I say “recieved” I mean I spent 6 hours of mind numbing time trying to get data transferred and reloaded onto my new machine. What made it fun was a little lunch reunion with some old coworkers who left our group.  Julie and Mindy (and Anna and Tatjana, but I still thankfully work with the last two)!  Those girls are fun and smart and just make me laugh. So sad that we don’t all work together anymore.

It’s list time.

Things I am mortally afraid of:

1. Spiders
2. Heights
3. Any and all silverfish, June bugs, mosqiutoeaters, grasshoppers, those bugs that look like twigs, really anything with multiple legs that is smaller than me.
4. The dark when I’m alone.
5. Doberman pinchers
6. Work related group functions.
7. Meat on a bone.

One may wonder why I don’t have things like “the economy”, ”terrorism”, “global warming”, and ”the upcoming election” on here. Well, honestly, there’s not much I can do about those things except try to save money, recycle, and vote, so what’s the use in freaking out about them?  Now spiders – there’s a real problem – i can’t even be in the house when there’s a bug in here. Which poses a problem, since I have a child. I can’t just grab the kid and high tail it out of here quickly. There’s diaper changes, packing of the diaper bag, getting of the sippycup and cheerios, etc… there is no quick get away with a child.

Another list – this one is plagerized from another blog. But I thought it was so fighteningly familiar that I thought I’d repost, as many of us will be partaking in some festive libations this weekend:

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. No thanks, I’m married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
4. Taco Bell? No thanks, I’m not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn’t!  No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7. I’m not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no
coordination.  I’d hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom?  I refuse to pee in this parking lot
or on the side of the road.

Happy 4th of July!  (And happy early birthday to Lisa )